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Tips for Making Networking Feel Less Creepy and More Effective

26 January 2016

Allison read How Not to Be a Networking Leech: Tips for Seeking Professional Advice and Top 10 Tips to Work a Room Like a Champ and knew that many of her clients would appreciate these practical suggestions for making a dreaded process a little easier and more meaningful.

Tags: allison read, careers, communication

Bring up the topic of networking and more often than not people will grimace, roll their eyes, and even look a little green. They’ve read all the articles that say it’s just a part of healthy professional (and life) relationship development, but it still often feels like asking for favors or having one more meeting when it feels like there’s not enough time in the week for all their “real” work.

When I’m working with clients in the midst of career transition, I do everything I can to remind them that networking doesn’t need to feel like begging, and that if you attend to your network a little bit every month, then when you need something from your network, it won’t feel so bad. But if you’ve ever been in search of a new job, then you know that’s the hardest time of all to have a good attitude about networking.

Whether you’re in career transition or just want to make sure you’re doing what you should for your network even while you’re in a great job, I think these two articles will help you with two of the most common complaints I hear: one, that it’s rough to walk into a room full of people and make it a meaningful experience for yourself and others, and two, that when you do need some help, you don’t want to feel like you’re begging or taking advantage of someone.

In Top 10 Tips to Work a Room Like a Champ, Lifehacker’s Editor-in-Chief, Whitson Gordon, serves as a curator for some of the best advice I’ve seen on how to make your experience in a roomful of people better for everyone. You may be thinking, “Just what I need… another top 10 list!” But not only does Gordon give you a solid top 10 list, he also provides a lot of useful links on why everything on this list matters and how to actually do them all:

      10. Enter with Confidence
      9.  Have a Plan
      8.  Pick Your Battles
      7.  Look for Pairs of People
      6.  Give a Good Handshake
      5.  Remember People’s Names
      4.  Pay Attention to Your Body Language
      3.  Turn Small Talk Into a Conversation
      2.  Listen
      1.  Be Okay with a Little Awkwardness

In How Not to Be a Networking Leech: Tips for Seeking Professional Advice, Margaret Morford, does the best job I’ve seen of explaining how to make sure the individual meetings you request are respectful of the person you’re networking with. I think if more people followed Morford’s advice, they’d feel a lot less creepy about the whole process of networking in the first place. Here’s the list of what she suggests, but you should definitely read the whole article to find out why these ideas matter:

  • Make the meeting convenient
  • Buy their coffee or meal
  • Go with a prepared list of questions
  • Don’t argue about their advice or point out why it wouldn’t work for you
  • Don’t ask for intellectual property or materials
  • Never ask for any written follow-up
  • Spend time at the end of the meeting finding out what you can do for them
  • Always thank them more than once
  • Do not refer others to the same expert
  • Ask an expert for free help only once
  • As you ask people for help, always consider how you in turn can help others

One of the most important things you can do to make networking more effective and less uncomfortable is to shift your mindset about the whole process. I think the advice in both of these articles will help you to start making that shift.



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